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Archive for March, 2007

Fly girl

March 29th, 2007 No comments

In 2004, I boarded my first plane. I was nervous, not only for the flight but for the adventure upon which I was about to embark.

I remember listening intently to all the safety procedures that the stewardesses presented. I took a deep breath and held on tight. Away we went! Landing was a nerve wracking experience, but it went fine and I soon found myself standing, for the first time, in the Nashville International Airport.

I had traveled to Nashville to spend my first trip far away from my parents. It was a week with a friend — one that I had absolutely no clue would end up being my husband three years later in a city I hoped to some day live. I ended up having a good time, though stresses surrounding my presence left me on the couch much of the time with an upset stomach and migraine headache. I succeeded, nonetheless, in experiencing many of the highlights of Nashville, and I left the city a week later feeling smarter and glad I’d made the trip.

It would be over a year before I’d fly again, but since then I’ve logged thousands of air miles. Every single one of them due to my husband. Trips to Nashville to visit as our relationship changed and grew. Then trips to Portland, Oregon; Las Vegas, Nevada; Atlanta, Georgia; Jackson, Mississippi; and Honolulu, Hawaii… all with (or to be with) my traveling musician. I’m an airplane professional!

Today, I fly to visit my family back home in Texas. I continue to log the miles constantly, and the tales of my travels seem to always have an amusing angle to them. Everything from flying to point A and renting a car to continue to point B, to spending hours and hours in an airport waiting for a delayed flight.

My latest two flights both consisted of seeing my husband off… behind security.

This last trip back home occured only an hour before my husband caught a plane himself to a show. We ended up going through security together, kissing good bye, and then walking to opposite terminals to catch planes going to completely opposite ends of the country. The time before, I landed back in Nashville only a few hours before he took off for a show. He drove our truck to the airport, and as I kissed him hello and goodbye, he handed me the keys to drive it back home!

Being married to a musician always guarantees that things will not be boring. I rarely go with him on the road, but I do try to go any time I can. It’s allowed me to see placed I’d have probably never seen otherwise. Three years ago, I was terrified to fly. Today, it’s as natural as walking. I look forward to our next adventure!

Categories: flying, ironic musings, our history Tags:

An interesting phenomenon

March 25th, 2007 No comments

I will be leaving our apartment in about 20 minutes to go pick up my husband from the airport. I am sitting here pretty much twiddling my thumbs. Supper will be ready to take out of the oven (or rather just place on “warm” until we get home) in the next 5 minutes. So, that will leave me about 15 minutes to kill.

I assure you that as it gets closer and closer to time to leave, everything will start working against me, and I’ll be late to pick him up.

It NEVER fails. Time to kill until I go pick him up at the airport or the bus lot. Then I still end up being late. Thank God my husband is patient with my incessant talent for being late or early… never right on time.

Categories: ironic musings Tags:

Alone and sick

March 22nd, 2007 No comments

A downside of being a musician’s widow: home alone and sick.

Nashville being ranked 16th highest city for allergies, it stands to reason that my usual Spring allergy outbreak would be worse than normal. I’m miserable and taking care of myself. My husband took off on the road for the weekend, and I kissed him good bye at the airport with a sneeze and a sniffle.

Now, it is kind of nice to be able to sleep on the couch all day drugged up and not feel too bad about not taking care of your spouse since they are off doing what they need to do. But at the same time, it would be really nice to be babied while sick.

At least its not the first time I’ve battled allergies, and I know it won’t be the last. And… at least its just allergies and not something like the flu. I will survive!

Categories: sick, whining Tags:

Finding kindred spirits

March 16th, 2007 No comments

A few nights ago, my husband played in an “All-Star Jam” and I went to watch him play as well as to network and socialize. I had such a great time floating from group to group, but two women that were with two of the other pickers were the people I spent the most time with during the evening.

One of the women, J.D., and I got a chance to talk for awhile as our husbands tore down. The music had stopped so we no longer had to yell at each other to be heard. Before long, we were exchanging “war stories” about our husbands on the road. We were immediate kindred spirits with similar philosophies on it.

Our big thing with our husbands is that, if you say you’ll call then call. It’s hard not to worry about him out on the road. If something happened, it would take a long time for it to get back to us, and even longer to get there to him. We need that reassurance from them that they are okay. And in the same vein, we need them to know WE are okay.

We then got on the subject out of “sleep schedules.” It was comforting to find someone else who says the words, “Don’t call before noon; I won’t be up.” With the guy’s working downtown late at night, or their not being able to call until the early morning hours after a show elsewhere — its not worth ever trying to turn our schedules “normal.” It’s bed between 1 AM and 5 AM. Then you get up at noon. It’s crazy to the rest of the world. It’s just the way it is with us.

I was so glad to find someone like myself. It was a nice reassurance. We’re out there — the musician’s widows of the world. There are less of us than there are musicians, so when you find one… you’re immediately friends.

Categories: other widows Tags:

Of trust

March 10th, 2007 No comments

A key element of the relationship between a musician and their significant other is TRUST. This applies to all careers — military the largest example — in which couples are separated for long periods of time.

Last night, when my husband and I talked after his show, he told me about a couple he met after the show at the bar. They’ve been married less than a month and as a fellow newlywed, my husband took an even greater interest in striking up a conversation with them.

The woman, he said, asked my husband if it was hard for me to let him go out on the road so far from home. He said that, no, its easy. We’ve just got that something special that allows it to happen without (much) consequence.

Now, I interrupt the story briefly to say I’d never categorize it as “easy” but its certainly not “hard” either. That is my little disclaimer in this tale.

My husband went on to tell me that the woman said she could never do it, because, after all, men will be men. My husband was alarmed by that accusation and told her simply that he disagreed. That when you find that right person, infidelity is not an issue. He’d never in a million years cheat on me, and he knows I am the same way. We have that strong level of trust between us, because we KNOW.

It actually left him and I very sad to see a couple JUST married carrying doubt in one another. It made us just more secure in how solid we are… the high level of trust we do hold in one another. Especially considering how often we are apart.

There is a song by Alabama that asks why the girls fall in love with the boys in the band. I am not stupid. There ARE women out there who are looking for a fast hook-up with one of the boys in the band. But just because there are women out there like that does not mean my husband will take the bait. Because I know with all of my being he wouldn’t, and there is great strength and comfort in that fact.

Categories: relationship thoughts Tags: