Musician's Widow

Memorial Day weekend. The weekend that is considered the “kick off to summer.” Boats hit the late. Floaties hit the pool. The grills are fired up. Everyone drags out their swim wear. And stores hold huge sales. It’s ALLLLLLLL good.

But. Why do we have Memorial Day? Its not so the girls can jump into string bikinis. It’s not so stores can sell more clothes. It’s not all about the hot dog.

No. We have Memorial Day for this:

To remember the men and women who have given all to keep us all free. To remember their sacrifice. To remember the sacrifice of their families. To say thank you to them… to all our military. All the rest of that stuff? We probably wouldn’t even HAVE that if not for our soldiers.

From http://www.usmemorialday.org:

Memorial Day was officially proclaimed on 5 May 1868 by General John Logan, national commander of the Grand Army of the Republic, and was first observed on 30 May 1868, when flowers were placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery. The first state to officially recognize the holiday was New York in 1873. By 1890 it was recognized by all of the northern states. The South refused to acknowledge the day, honoring their dead on separate days until after World War I (when the holiday changed from honoring just those who died fighting in the Civil War to honoring Americans who died fighting in any war).

In 1971, Congress made the day into a three-day weekend in with the National Holiday Act, stating that Memorial Day would be celebrated the last Monday of May.

Friday, I saw a report on the news about the flags being placed at Arlington National Cemetery, and I wondered where I could find something similar in Nashville. I asked my husband, and yesterday he took me to Nashville National Cemetery.

We were both deeply moved by what we found. All the flags, perfectly lined up beside the perfectly lined up headstones. The headstones seemed to stretch forever. We drove slowly, stopping periodically so I could snap photos. A few other people were doing the same. Some were there to put flowers on loved one’s graves. We were silenced. We were touched.

Headstones ranged from the 1800s to today. The ones that said things like, “Loving wife and mother” brought tears to my eyes. (Especially realizing some were MY age.) These people gave the ultimate sacrifice for all of us.

As we drove through an area of particularly old headstones, I asked my husband if he, too, thought some of these soldiers would be saddened by our world today. My husband said he felt they probably would. It made me want to do better. It made me want to earn the life they gave their own life for me and everyone around me to have. These people who helped change the course of history.

After our trip to the cemetery, we did swing out by the lake for awhile for supper. But we both had a different vibe from earlier in the day. We were more thoughtful. More reverent of the day/weekend.

If wherever you are, you have a chance to visit a soldier’s grave… please do. Take a moment to remember why we have this three day weekend. It’s not about bikinis and new shoes. It’s not about barbecue and beer. It’s about our military… the men and women who gave so much for our freedom. Let’s not take it for granted.

On a personal note… my grandpa was a WWII veteran. Tuesday would have been his 89th birthday. I was always proud to be his granddaughter… He had so many stories he would never share, and now never can again. Miss him.

God bless our soldiers… and all their loves one they’ve left behind.

I’m not a fan of April Fools Day. If I really think about it… I never have been. Its like Angela England tweeted earlier, “Thank goodness April Fool’s Day is over- I can’t stand not being able to take my friends’ words at face value!”

And that’s exactly it. I don’t like not trusting the people I’m supposed to be able to trust!

I’d like to say this is why I didn’t make a blog post yesterday. It would actually be a really good excuse! However, I was just too darn busy all day to write a post, and once I settled down with time to write… I was too tuckered out to do it.

Back to the subject at hand, though.

I do get seriously amused by the various April Fools Pranks pulled by companies and web-sites. Google never ceases to amuse me every April 1st. (Seriously, though, what a brilliant way to fight obesity from sitting at a computer all day!) And I have to admit, Starbucks hit home this year since I’ve ironically been craving a Skinny Vanilla Latte from there for days. And I really wish I’d screen captured Flickr changing their logo for a day to add an “E.” I’m still snickering at the number of people who took it seriously. (Do a Flickr search for the logo and see several people asking what happened with it.)

However, it can get frustrating and hurtful sometimes when pranks get out of hand. I watched a few online that started to get out of control, when people weren’t sure if they should take the prank seriously or not. I even ended up posting a photo with the caption “Not a joke” to make sure people took ME seriously!

Like I said, I hate not being able to trust the people I should always be able to trust. My absolute favorite quote is:

“To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.” – George MacDonald

April Fools Day snubs that hard, and that makes me very uncomfortable. I think if I could sleep the day away, I would. It’s just too stressful not to be able to trust people!

So, I welcome April 2nd with open arms. Come back to me, sanity. Come back to me, trust.

For the last few weekends, I’ve lit a virtual Advent wreath here on my blog. Week one represented Hope. Week two represented Peace. Week three represented Joy. This final weekend represents Love.

Lighting the last candle means Christmas is less than a week away. Or, in this case, its exactly a week away. I’m ready for it. I wish I were MORE ready, meaning I wish I’d have been able to do more leading up to the holiday to get into the spirit. I seem to be constantly falling in and out of the spirit, depending on the day. This last week I was sick, and most definitely not focused on Christmas through that! But here in this moment, as I write this, I am back in the mood. I am ready for it. Excited for it. Looking forward to it.

So here I light this last candle, virtually atleast.

Week 5: LOVE

Its hard to talk about love, because love is something you feel. Its something you experience. Its both a verb and a noun. It’s considered the greatest of all things…

Love life. Love each other. Live your life with love in your heart. Enter this season with love, for it is out of love that this most blessed of holidays exists. As you feel yourself filled with stress of to do lists, shopping, decorating and travel, remember to love one another. For it is out of love that everyone will experience the wonder of Christmas to its fullest.

And now abide faith, hope, and love, these three, but the greatest is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13

Happy Veteran’s Day!  Is that a proper greeting for this holiday? I have no idea… but its a day we need to take to pause and reflect on our soldiers — past, present and future.

God bless our soldiers. The men and women who protect this country. Who ensure our freedoms and provide us protection.

God bless our vets, who have gone into battle and conflict, paving the way of where we are today.

God bless those who dream of some day defending this country, stepping up and continuing the tradition of greatness.

God bless the families of those men and women who serve — for while they may not be in uniform, they give a lot, too.

Sadly, as we rely on our military to protect us, we consistently turn our backs on them upon their return home. Veteran’s Day is a day set aside to honor them, but what do we do instead? We focus on Christmas sales, and shopping. We go to our jobs and MAYBE make note of an American flag somewhere. We drive by VFW halls and not once pause to consider what “V.F.W.” means.

We live our lives without noticing the many veterans who stand among us, struggling to fit into civilian life. We cruise through Nov. 11th as if it were just some day of the week. We turn our backs on our veterans in hospitals, nursing homes, or even those who end up homeless for various reasons. We ignore them, even as we’ve so heavily relied on them to keep us safe. To let us sleep in peace at night.

Perhaps it could be argued that if we don’t feel the need to pause and take note, it means they’ve done their jobs. It’s like you always experience: no one notices when you do a good job, but they sure as hell notice every time you make a mistake!! But in the case of our military, that’s unacceptable. Completely unacceptable.

You don’t have to be best friends with a veteran. You don’t even have to agree with them on any topic. But you have to respect and thank them for their service to our country. They ensure us the freedom to do as we please, when we please. They even give us the freedom to ignore them, should we so choose.

Though, I, for one, choose to say THANK YOU. How about you?

I just found a new twitter feed to follow. One that has had me laughing my butt off for the last ten minutes. FakeAPStylebook If you were a journalist, are a journalist or know anything about journalism, go follow it for some much needed laughter at yourself. And the AP. Which is perfectly acceptable.

Anyway, a post this afternoon sparked a memory for me:

My husband and I spent our first Halloween together in an apartment.  We had no idea if we’d get any trick-or-treaters, but just in case, on Halloween, we made a run to the store for candy.

We picked up a fairly large bag of mixed flavors of candy, and then we wandered around the store browsing. My husband remembered he needed new razor blades, so he grabbed those as well.

It wasn’t until we stood in line at the check-out that we realized we had bought that bad-guy combo: razor blades and candy. We literally half-wondered if anyone would raise an eyebrow at us as we checked out. Instead, no one was even remotely phased by it! My husband even pointed it out to the checker, and still she gave us a blank stare that said, “So?”

As we left, I still waited for security and cops to descend upon us. I waited for the questioning of why we would want to harm little children dressed up as goblins, princesses and purple dinosaurs.

But instead, there was nothing. I was half relieved, half alarmed. We could have been criminals in the making! Razor blades and Halloween candy! These are two things you shouldn’t be purchasing in tandem! Quick someone come and question me about my motives!

We climbed in our vehicle without anyone even giving us a second glance. We drove off with our bad combination in hand.

We didn’t have a single trick-or-treater that year. We gave a neighbor’s kids a bag of candy, and we left some pumpkins with candy in them outside a few other apartment doors. Our candy didn’t go to waste, and my husband was able to shave just fine. But still, every Halloween we laugh about our first shopping excursion and our accidental combination purchase. An amusing memory from our first year together.

As an aside, parents definitely have to be careful every Halloween, and I know I will be when its my turn to take my kids trick-or-treating. The thought of razor blades in candy makes me shudder, and I wonder why someone would do something so awful to someone so innocent. :(