Musician's Widow

Memorial Day weekend. The weekend that is considered the “kick off to summer.” Boats hit the late. Floaties hit the pool. The grills are fired up. Everyone drags out their swim wear. And stores hold huge sales. It’s ALLLLLLLL good.

But. Why do we have Memorial Day? Its not so the girls can jump into string bikinis. It’s not so stores can sell more clothes. It’s not all about the hot dog.

No. We have Memorial Day for this:

To remember the men and women who have given all to keep us all free. To remember their sacrifice. To remember the sacrifice of their families. To say thank you to them… to all our military. All the rest of that stuff? We probably wouldn’t even HAVE that if not for our soldiers.

From http://www.usmemorialday.org:

Memorial Day was officially proclaimed on 5 May 1868 by General John Logan, national commander of the Grand Army of the Republic, and was first observed on 30 May 1868, when flowers were placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery. The first state to officially recognize the holiday was New York in 1873. By 1890 it was recognized by all of the northern states. The South refused to acknowledge the day, honoring their dead on separate days until after World War I (when the holiday changed from honoring just those who died fighting in the Civil War to honoring Americans who died fighting in any war).

In 1971, Congress made the day into a three-day weekend in with the National Holiday Act, stating that Memorial Day would be celebrated the last Monday of May.

Friday, I saw a report on the news about the flags being placed at Arlington National Cemetery, and I wondered where I could find something similar in Nashville. I asked my husband, and yesterday he took me to Nashville National Cemetery.

We were both deeply moved by what we found. All the flags, perfectly lined up beside the perfectly lined up headstones. The headstones seemed to stretch forever. We drove slowly, stopping periodically so I could snap photos. A few other people were doing the same. Some were there to put flowers on loved one’s graves. We were silenced. We were touched.

Headstones ranged from the 1800s to today. The ones that said things like, “Loving wife and mother” brought tears to my eyes. (Especially realizing some were MY age.) These people gave the ultimate sacrifice for all of us.

As we drove through an area of particularly old headstones, I asked my husband if he, too, thought some of these soldiers would be saddened by our world today. My husband said he felt they probably would. It made me want to do better. It made me want to earn the life they gave their own life for me and everyone around me to have. These people who helped change the course of history.

After our trip to the cemetery, we did swing out by the lake for awhile for supper. But we both had a different vibe from earlier in the day. We were more thoughtful. More reverent of the day/weekend.

If wherever you are, you have a chance to visit a soldier’s grave… please do. Take a moment to remember why we have this three day weekend. It’s not about bikinis and new shoes. It’s not about barbecue and beer. It’s about our military… the men and women who gave so much for our freedom. Let’s not take it for granted.

On a personal note… my grandpa was a WWII veteran. Tuesday would have been his 89th birthday. I was always proud to be his granddaughter… He had so many stories he would never share, and now never can again. Miss him.

God bless our soldiers… and all their loves one they’ve left behind.

Happy Veteran’s Day!  Is that a proper greeting for this holiday? I have no idea… but its a day we need to take to pause and reflect on our soldiers — past, present and future.

God bless our soldiers. The men and women who protect this country. Who ensure our freedoms and provide us protection.

God bless our vets, who have gone into battle and conflict, paving the way of where we are today.

God bless those who dream of some day defending this country, stepping up and continuing the tradition of greatness.

God bless the families of those men and women who serve — for while they may not be in uniform, they give a lot, too.

Sadly, as we rely on our military to protect us, we consistently turn our backs on them upon their return home. Veteran’s Day is a day set aside to honor them, but what do we do instead? We focus on Christmas sales, and shopping. We go to our jobs and MAYBE make note of an American flag somewhere. We drive by VFW halls and not once pause to consider what “V.F.W.” means.

We live our lives without noticing the many veterans who stand among us, struggling to fit into civilian life. We cruise through Nov. 11th as if it were just some day of the week. We turn our backs on our veterans in hospitals, nursing homes, or even those who end up homeless for various reasons. We ignore them, even as we’ve so heavily relied on them to keep us safe. To let us sleep in peace at night.

Perhaps it could be argued that if we don’t feel the need to pause and take note, it means they’ve done their jobs. It’s like you always experience: no one notices when you do a good job, but they sure as hell notice every time you make a mistake!! But in the case of our military, that’s unacceptable. Completely unacceptable.

You don’t have to be best friends with a veteran. You don’t even have to agree with them on any topic. But you have to respect and thank them for their service to our country. They ensure us the freedom to do as we please, when we please. They even give us the freedom to ignore them, should we so choose.

Though, I, for one, choose to say THANK YOU. How about you?

I don’t like to talk politics. It’s up there with religion on “topics to avoid if you don’t want to end up in a fight with someone.” An intelligent and fact-driven conversation very rarely happens.

However, I will say that ever since I was old enough to vote, its something I’ve taken seriously and appreciated about my country. Even when, for whatever reason, I did not vote in an election, I appreciated that I had to right to vote, along with the freedom to not vote, should it just not work out.

I’ve never been a fan of voting along party lines. I’ve always believed you vote based on your beliefs and what is best for the country. Do your homework on the candidates. Know what they stand for individually versus just knowing their party.

(I wish the people in office voted this way a lot more as well — based on what is best for the people who put them in office versus what their party expects of them. But, that’s a rant for another blog post that will probably never happen.)

Our ancestors went through a lot of strife for us to have this right.  Voting is our chance to have a say in our government. It’s the one time the majority is heard loud and clear. It’s when the candidates are reminded that its the American people who are their bosses. It’s the American people who decide if they still have a job or if they get a new job.

I will be at the polls today. I will proudly cast my vote and have my say. It’s my right… it’s your right, too.

July 4, 2009

My  husband had a show this July 4th only four hours away from Nashville in Rogersville, TN. My parents are visiting from Texas, and so we made the trip to see him play. East Tennessee is absolutely beautiful, so it was a treat to make the drive out, and its always fun to see a show!

After a fantastic concert, we settled in to watch the fireworks. I was about to sit down on my lounge chair backstage when a man standing at the barricade asked me to come over. My initial thought was, “Oh no…” already anticipating a request for an autograph.

Now, I don’t make promises that I could even remotely fill such a request… especially since generally such a request is frowned upon. Or at least it always has been with past artists. My husband is still the “new guy” and I don’t want to make waves. So it was definitely with trepidation that I approached him.

Within moments of walking up, I was handed a military ID, and told that he had just gotten back from Afghanistan and would be returning in 28 days. He’d traveled himself from Nashville specifically hoping to meet Joe Diffie (whom my husband works for). He asked if I could possibly make that happen.

I paused a bit, but I decided the least I could do is try. So I headed towards the bus… not entirely sure what to do. I was saved when I saw the tour manager coming at me.

So, starting with, “please don’t hate me…” I explained the situation. And much to my pleasant surprise, he said he’d ask Joe! While I waited, two women approached me asking if Joe would be doing an autograph session after the show, then asking who I was, etc. I was, quite frankly, blind sided by them… and it is also people like these two women that make me hesitant to speak with show attendees. Its questions being shot at me rapid fire that will fluster me, and in turn irritate.

I was TICKLED when the tour manager came off the bus to say that Joe definitely wanted to talk to the man, and I lead him over and introduced them.

Over the course of about the next hour, I had the opportunity to interact with the soldier several times, learning he was originally from Texas — attended my rival school of University of Texas — and that he had come home on leave with many injuries. Shrapnel in his leg, a broken finger, bite wounds on his hand, etc. The fireworks freaked him out (understandably so!) but his kids loved it.

Finally, when he met Joe, he told several stories of things he had experienced while in Afghanistan. And afterwards, he came over and thanked me profusely for taking him seriously and making it happen that he got to meet Joe.  He hugged me several times and gave me a kiss on the cheek (telling my husband that if he pointed out that he’d just kissed an Aggie they’d tussle right there!), and all I could keep saying was, “No… thank YOU for all you do.”

The experience of meeting this soldier was a highlight of my July 4th. Getting to thank a soldier… we should all have the opportunity to do that. They are the true heroes.