Musician's Widow

High school rock stars

There’s a Cross Canadian Ragweed song that says, “You’re always 17 in your hometown.” And in a lot of ways, its true. I don’t know what it is about rolling into your hometown that slips you back into that mode. You remember your high school glories. Suddenly I find myself walking with that old swagger. I look around and, while many things have changed, I find a deep comfort in how much is still the same.

I’m in my hometown right now, working at the family business. The other day, I had to make a trip over to the pharmacy. I forgot to pack allergy pills and had to go grab myself a bottle to get through the change in climate and geography.

As I went to leave, I noticed a couple cars in the parking lot. Probably 7 or 8 high school aged kids were hanging out. I had my windows up so I couldn’t hear if they were jamming out to tunes or anything.  But I recognized that swagger in their step. I recognized the attitude in how they  leaned against the cars. This town is THEIR town right now. They are the keepers of the school’s spirit.

It made me smile. It made me actually shake my head to realize none of them were even in school when I was in their shoes. It didn’t make me feel old, as I thought it would. It just made me realize that time moves on, and they are where they are to be and I am where I am meant to be. I wouldn’t trade places with them for all the money in the world.

I may be in my  hometown… but I am most definitely not 17. And I am totally happy in that fact.

I’ve been battling something of a case of insomnia the last two weeks. I’m not entirely sure what set it off, but I just can’t sleep most nights. I lay awake, tossing and turning, cursing the ceiling. My husband sleeping soundly beside me. It’s so frustrating! I just want to sleep normal hours! Hopefully, I’ll get past this again soon. Until then, I’ll be keeping watch through the night hours for everyone.

We finally had our first winter snow here in Nashville. Not much at my house:

But, its still pretty. Downtown was snowing pretty good when my husband and I went out last night. I’ve definitely lived here long enough that I’m not phased by it any more. A couple years ago, you wouldn’t get me out of the house if there was even a CHANCE of snow. Now? Eh. Now I watch the weather and gauge my freak-out need accordingly. This? This was not even a 1 on my freak-out scale.

It was nice to finally see some snow, though. Last year we had an exceptional amount of snow, and I don’t want THAT again. But, the snow is pretty and I was hoping I’d get to see some this winter. Now I have and it finally feels like winter to me. So that’s a yay.

Happy Friday the 13th, everyone! Oh I know, its superstitious as being a day of bad luck. I’ve not really ever noticed anything exceptional about past Friday the 13ths. So, I just say, “Hey, cool, its Friday. Let the weekend begin!”

I did learn something already today, though. “friggatriskaidekaphobia – A morbid, irrational fear of Friday the 13th.” (From Skeptic’s Dictionary) That’s a really big word and should mean, “Fear of getting that word in a spelling bee.” But maybe that’s just me.

Anyway, don’t let the date freak you out. Enjoy the day! Happy Snow Day to any teachers and students who may be reading, ready to enjoy a 4 day weekend. Go back to bed and make the most of it! Maybe you can sleep… here’s hoping I can, too!

Yesterday evening I did something I rarely do.

Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

Oh I looked at Facebook periodically. And I did get some postcards addressed to be mailed. But past that? Nothing. And it was wonderful!

I’ve been fighting the last bits of a cold I’ve had since before Thanksgiving. I’m past this sicky point, but I’m smack dab in that it-just-won’t-go-away-why-is-there-so-much-snot point. And blowing my nose has earned me a strained muscle and/or inflamed ribs on one side. It’s a big case of “Ow!” when I sneeze or blow my nose now. I ask people to hug me very gently right now!

But life doesn’t stop going at full speed for a lingering cold and sore ribs. So I’ve plugged along despite it all. I’ve needed a nothing night. No laundry. No dishes. No straightening here and there. No Christmas decorating. Just me, the TV, the recliner and periodic naps. Hubby is learning new music for a fill-in gig this weekend and he followed my lead. He’d practice awhile, then he’d nap. Back and forth.

Again: It. Was. Wonderful.

Rest is, in my opinion, the body’s best medicine for all things, but rest is always the first thing sacrificed for one thing or another. A Christmas wish for all my readers: An evening like I just had. An evening doing nothing but resting. Do it. You’re body will thank you.

October went by crazy fast for me. I was just BUSY, and as we jump into November with both feet I’m still busy!

Last month, it was busy downtown. I picked up a lot of nights in the bar — something that paid off really well, and I am SO grateful for that fact. It’s left me on a total vampire schedule (I just can’t flip flop like most people!), but its also left me feeling very satisfied with the feeling of hard work done well.

Now, though, my workload is completely different. I have a lot of stuff I need to handle for my parent’s business — research in products and stuff. I have a CD cover to design, like, yesterday. I have a friend looking to start a blog and wants me to help him with the design of it. I am trying to do NaNoWriMo. And I’m just looking to enjoy my birthday month and Thanksgiving!

BUSY! That is me.

And I plan to love every moment of it.

If you search my Flickr photostream for the word “Fall” you get 136 photos back… a lot when you consider that I’m pretty sure I’ve failed to tag all my fall photos with “Fall” and I’ve only been seriously keeping up my Flickr page for about three years.

Growing up in Texas, Fall basically meant football season. The temperatures would go from sweltering to warm with the occasional chill in the wind. Past that, Fall = Football. Period.

Oh okay, it meant a bunch of birthdays, Halloween and Thanksgiving. And school pictures. But past that? Fall colors were what you saw only by cutting out construction paper leaves. You saw them in decorations bought at arts & crafts fairs. Or you saw them in magazines and on TV. But in Texas? It just goes summer leaves to no leaves at all in the blink of an eye. No magical color change.

Then I moved to Tennessee.

I still remember I had just recently moved here, and I was driving to our apartment from the store and I was struck by the colors all around me. I called my brother to squeal on his voicemail about how pretty it was. I don’t know why that memory remains with me, but it does.

Fall tends to not love me back. I get a yearly sinus infection, and I end up staring out the window at the pretty in misery. But it never stops me from still anticipating the season with glee.

My first visit to a "pumpkin patch" in 2006

Pumpkin patches to visit. Corn mazes to traverse.

There’s Pumpkin Spiced Lattes to drink.

Its time to get out warmer clothing.

And the colors… oh the colors! It starts with a little tinge of color in a tree here and a tree there. Then you start to notice all the trees are slowly changing from green to reds, yellows and oranges. The leaves that have already fallen crunch under your feet as you walk through the grass, and they speckle the drive way with their brilliant beauty.  Sometimes when the wind blows, they fall around you like glitter.

My husband and I like to go on drives through the country to look at all the colors. Those construction paper leaves of elementary school have nothing on the real thing! I stare out the window — be it my living room window or the passenger side window of our truck — in awe. Mesmerized by the changes this season brings.

We’ve had our first freeze warning of the year… though the extreme cold is short lived for now. We’ll be back in the 70s this weekend, just in time for a group trip to a corn maze where we’ll laugh and get lost among the cornstalks. A hayride will make us feel like kids again, and a cup of apple cider will warm the soul as much as the tummy.

Yes, Fall is definitely my favorite season of the year. And I plan to enjoy everything I can about it before winter gets its grip on the area.

Tuesday brought a cold front, which brought rain and cold temps. Wednesday brought a quiet day at home, hiding away from the cold and rain. Wednesday evening brought… having to get out in the cold.

I’ll share a little secret with you. I kind of love when it gets cold.

I remember a conversation I had with a friend in college. We had our first good “cold snap” in College Station, and we were sitting people watching before class began. Our class had probably about 100 people in it, so it was in a large auditorium style room. We always sat near the back just for the purpose of people watching (and the occasional nap during class). My friend (whose name escapes me this many years later) goes, “I love cold weather. People actually dress nice when its cold.”

That line has stuck with me all these years, because she was right. Gone are the skimpy tops, the ones that usually show off those random little problem areas that we all have. Gone are grungy shorts, and dirty toe nails sticking out of flip flops. They’re replaced with sweaters, jackets, jeans and boots. For the sheer necessity of warmth, people step up how they dress. Suddenly, the summer slouches are replaced with the winter snappies.

This was something my husband noticed before we left to go out to dinner and to take him to pick up the bus. Out of necessity, I pulled out my sweater box and pulled on a deep green turtle neck. Matched with the same jeans and boots I’d worn periodically through the last few months, it made the whole ensemble look much nicer! My husband commented how nice I looked, and I found myself repeating what my friend said so many years ago, “I love cold weather. People actually dress nice when its cold.”

The last several years, I’ve had one little tradition that I am sure my husband cringes at deep down. I love, love, love the Bouclé sweaters from Victoria’s Secret. Love. Like, if I could live in them all winter I would. But that would get very expensive. Nonetheless, every year I try to catch one on sale and order it. I noticed this year they have a sweaterdress that I would love to have, but won’t get because (1) I won’t pay that much and (2) if I bought it, I’d probably sleep in it. All the time.

I love sweaters! I also love layering. It’s the most brilliant thing ever. Stylish and functional. Warm but if you get too hot you just shed a couple layers. Then, ta da! Not so hot any more… but still stylish! And coats have pockets! My purse gets a lot lighter in the winter as my cell phone and keys pretty much just live in my jacket. I might even be guilty of wearing a jacket a little longer than necessary for this purpose alone.

Anyway, I’m seriously no fashion guru, but I do love winter fashions. Everyone steps up the fashion without even trying to look nicer… they just want to be warmer. It’s total win/win!

It’s cold snappy!