Tag Archives: life

random musings

Stages of life

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Yesterday was the first day of school for most schools in Texas. (School started here in Tennessee a couple weeks ago.) Being from Texas, over half of my friends on Facebook are old friends and classmates there. Its the thing I love about Facebook: keeping up with old friends.

I was amazed how many of my classmates from high school had kids starting Kindergarten! Post after post after post of “first day of school” photos on my wall. I loved it, but it also made me sit back and really ponder stages of life.

Just last night, we had friends over for dinner and visiting. I had one of those moments that made me take stock of life. Sometimes, I wonder what its going to be like to “grow up.”

Despite being married over five years. Despite having a home of my own, paying my bills, going to work, etc. I still feel young! I AM young! I’m an adult making adult decisions, but I still feel young. But last night, hosting friends, I had a moment of, “This is my house. This is my life. I am an adult. Wow.”

Then I sat down at my laptop and saw so many classmates sending their kids off to school. And once again, I had to look at life. We’re the same age, but we are definitely at different stages of life. It doesn’t make them “older” or “more mature” than I am. They’re just on a different path, and I am SO happy for them.

The grass is not greener on their side. It’s not greener on my side. It’s all about living our own lives our own ways: and that right there is what make us all adults. To me, we are all still so young, but we are also all grown up taking each stage of life at our own paces.

general-post

Friday afternoon on my porch

Life got really busy and crazy for awhile. Then as soon as it slowed down, my body slowed down even further leaving me sick in bed with a fever for a few days. Life is normal again, save for the nagging cough that’s hung around and the stuffy nose that just won’t leave, with a normal schedule and normal responsibilities. Somewhere along the “too busy to write” I also lost a lot of interest in it. Every day I open my blog site, and most days I close it without even clicking “new post.”

But today, I got up from a nice long night of sleep, went outside with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and I just sat on my porch swing.

The lawn was freshly mowed yesterday before my husband left for another weekend on the road. Friday is trash day, so a few now-empty trashcans still sit on the side of the road, waiting for their owners to come home from work. The thermometer reads 91° but in the shade with the light breeze it doesn’t seem so bad. Our American flag on the front of the house flutters, and a bee buzzes me every now and then.

I take it all in and realize how blessed I am to live in a safe, quiet neighborhood. It’s a beautiful summer day, and I’m struck with the urge to write and share it with everyone. I do so love to write still, but I can’t keep forcing myself to try to write every single day. It takes the fun out of it, and it makes it truly feel like a job. I have to want to write every day again, like I once did. Writing is something I enjoy, and there is no reason I can’t keep it as part of my career. But writing is a pleasure, and it can’t be forced or it feels fake.

I’m not here to pledge to write more often, but I am here to pledge to write as I feel compelled to do so. Life is back to normal, and there is no reason for me to continue living as if it isn’t. I need to get out of my date book and back into the world. The breeze rustling my hair told me that. And it is high time I listen.