There are a few things I “hate.”  Liver is one of those things. Red Raiders and Longhorns are two other things. (*grin*) I’m not even fond of making phone calls. (THAT is a blog post in and of itself!) But one thing I REALLY don’t like is going to the doctor.

I think it all started when I went through a period of time in which it seemed like I was at the hospital every time I turned around. I had the mantra, “I hate hospitals.” which eventually just morphed into, “I hate going to the doctor.”

Now, don’t get me wrong, there are times it is good to be at the doctor’s office or the hospital. Like, a baby being born. That’s a good thing! Or someone being discharged after having been sick. That’s also a good thing! And, really, doctors serve a very important and necessary purpose in our world. We’d be in terrible shape without them. So I am thankful for doctors.

I just don’t like having to see them.

A big reason, I think, is the fear of finding out something bad. I confess, I am a big, “Hear no evil, see no evil…” fan. Is that good? Not really. But its how I am. So there is that. Even when I feel completely healthy and have no signs of anything, I fear being told, “Your tests came back strange,” or, “I noticed something strange when I did this.” I don’t like being blindsided. No one does. No one should. But the fact remains that it can happen. In the end, its best to know when something is wrong, so you can fix it. I know this. But I also know that I don’t like those kinds of surprises.

So as such, I don’t like going to the doctor.

Another thing, I’ve had too many times lately in which I HAVE been sick and I’ve gone to the doctor only to not get anywhere. The worst time was when I had a horrible sinus infection. I’ve had enough of them to know when I have a sinus infection. The doctor came in to the room — I could barely even sit up I felt so bad — she pushed between my eyes and went, “Does this hurt.”

It didn’t. So she said I didn’t have a sinus infection and didn’t want to give me anything. I would have been livid if I’d had the energy to feel that way. I had to fight to get a prescription antibiotic! It left me with yet another bad taste in my mouth towards doctors.

So. I don’t like doctors. I fear being given bad news, and I fear not getting help when I truly need it. Both of which kind of defeat the purpose of the doctor in the first place, right?

But I do go. I went today for a check-up in fact. I know their need. I know their purpose. I respect them immensely. But that being said, I still don’t like them.