Tag Archives: smile

What insecurity?

A whole new smile
A whole new smile

I am a pretty confident woman. Actually, I like to think I’m a very confident woman. A positive person. Someone who loves to smile and who loves to see others smile. I like to make other people happy, and I long ago found one of the best ways is through just a smile.  And I’ve been told many times over that I have a great smile.

However, when asked what my favorite facial feature is on myself, I would always without hesitation say, “My eyes!” They were hidden for years behind thick glasses until, when in college, I finally got the nerve to get contacts. (I couldn’t, prior to that, fathom putting something IN MY EYE. But now, I can practically do it in my sleep.) Even so, when wearing make-up I’d choose to feature my eyes. I’ve leaned on eye liner for years to make them stand out, and, as always told in make-up rules, I’d leave my lips alone. A little gloss, or a neutral tone now and then, but on a whole I wouldn’t accent them at all.

Strange for someone who loves to smile, right? Strange for someone with confidence.

However, deep, deep down, in a place that I never gave any power, there was an insecurity due to my teeth.

Tillamook Cheese Factory
Far from perfect teeth.

Now, I am dead serious when I say that I never gave it much conscious thought. About the only time I really gave my teeth much power was when taking a self-portrait. Let’s see if you notice what I am talking about…

mosaic66d405f6296e3f678c546d25c7a0bd23b9cd84ab

Yup. In photos, my teeth were my little hidden secret. And it is in THAT action that I admit they were an insecurity. Very few people would ever make a comment on my teeth. I generally felt that anyone who did had issues of their own and were making themselves feel better by pointing out MY major imperfection. But in reality, the few people who would say anything were always very nice about it. Asking with curiosity why I’d not ever had braces. Or, in one case, giving me a high five with a smile of their own to revel their own front gap! But it would never fail… it would take a few minutes to “shake it off” when my insecurity was brought out front to my attention.

All that being said, getting my teeth fixed has been very low on my radar for years. If I hadn’t fixed them by now, what was the point?

72_541515795924_2190_nI mean, I’m happily married to a man who makes me feel beautiful everyday… who looks at me like I’m gorgeous even when I know I look like I’ve been hit by a truck.

I have a great confidence already, and my teeth aren’t exactly on my radar. My family and friends love me as I am. I’ve never been held back in life in general (as far as I know!) due to my teeth.  So… what would be the point?

Then last summer, in the midst of getting a lot dental work done, my dentist presented me with an offer/option. One of my front teeth had a cavity in it, and it would need some work soon. What if we put crowns over the front teeth, and he could reshape them to be straighter through those crowns?

For me, my stomach clinched at the thought of the cost. It would be a lot of money! What on earth would I be thinking if I did this!? However, the offer was intriguing. And after some discussion with my parents and my husband, I agreed to do it.

So one day last summer, I went into the dentist for some sedation dentistry, and I came out with temporary crowns on my teeth. That looked just like my old teeth. I had seen the proposed models of what my teeth would look like in the end, and it was nice! A definite improvement.

We will skip the silly reasons why it took almost six months and one visit to re-cast my molds for the crowns, but on Monday morning I headed in for the big reveal.

And I walked out with a perfect smile. My dentist went above and beyond what he’d proposed to do for me. I keep looking in the mirror and being taken aback by my new smile. I keep running my tongue over the back of my teeth, looking for the gap that no longer exists. Occasionally I notice forming words with my lips has changed. And now… I want to wear lipstick. My old teeth-based insecurity replaced by a new smile.

Here I am at 33 with a whole new look… and here’s the funny thing. Now I feel more motivated to shed the 15 lbs I’ve put on in the last 7 years. I want the rest of my body to match the new smile. It’s made me want to care about ME more. It’s given me a boost I never in a million years thought I needed.

2014-02-19 03.57.53

Made me happy

Writing prompt today from Daily Challenge by Me You Health: Share 3 small things that made you happy when you were a child or teenager.Think back to your childhood or teen years and share three little things that made you ridiculously happy. Was it making a phone call to a favorite aunt or uncle you didn’t talk to often? A food that knocked your socks off the first time you tasted it? A memorable trip to a museum? If it brought a grin to your young face, it belongs on the list. *I’m currently on a “Finding Fulfillment” track on Daily Challenge (a site that gives you a daily challenge to promote everyday well-being).

Childhood… when things are simpler and you’re clueless to how amazing the simplicity is. This prompt has left me filing through memories for a long time, trying to choose the best answers to share.

Books. I wish I read even half as much as I did as a kid. I devoured books like they were candy. And even long after I could read, Mom would read to me before sleep. No matter how sleepy she was, she’d read to me. As I got older, we transitioned to chapter books. I still remember when she read Where the Red Fern Grows and even my brother would come and listen as she’d read a chapter or two. Treasured, treasured memories.

Playing until dark. I can’t imagine spending all my summer in front of a TV playing video games or on the computer playing computer games. I remember playing outside until dark, and still not wanting to go inside. Swinging on the swings. Playing make-believe games, writing stories in my head as I went along. Playing basketball or any number of made-up games with my brother. Oh the carefree feeling of playing for hours on end!

Hotel stays. Call me silly, but I hardly remember trips to Six Flags, etc. It’s the hotel stays that I remember! Even though I really couldn’t swim, I looked forward to a hotel pool every summer. I wanted to jump in the pool the minute we checked in, and I think I’d have stayed in the water until the pool closed, if could have. We didn’t have cable when I was a kid. I grew up with CBS, ABC, NBC, PBS and (eventually) FOX. Sometimes when people my age talk about shows they liked as a kid, they receive a blank stare from me because I didn’t get the stations they got. However, any time we went on vacation and stayed in a hotel, I’d fight sleep to watch Nick-at-Night. Mr. Ed, The Patty Duke Show, and The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis are favorites of mine to this day because of those nights at a hotel.

I could list countless more memories that make me smile! This is so much fun! Definitely brought a smile to my face.

What about you… what are three of YOUR happy memories?