Monthly Archives: February 2008

perks, relationship thoughts, road-stories, travel

Would never do otherwise

There is one really big perk to having a husband that is a traveling musician: you DO get to do things you’d never do otherwise.

For example, two years ago I had the opportunity (which I took!) to go to Hawaii over the 4th of July holiday. Would we have gone otherwise? It’s possible, but also fairly doubtful. Honestly, I’d have never in a millions years thought I’d go there. Growing up, I never even listed Hawaii as a place I wanted to visit, simply because I knew it would never happen…

And then… it did. So beautiful! A wonderful trip! I’d love to go again some day, and who knows… we might. But, if we don’t, it’s okay, too. It’s a memory I will never, ever forget.


I also went to Las Vegas to see my husband do a show, and then just countless venues around Texas and, now, various locations close to Nashville. It’s a nice “perk” to the life. We spend so much time apart while he is on the road, but we do get advantages of getting to go and do things we’d never do otherwise. Occasionally, the random show sponsor will provide band members with gifts, or we’ll end up with the random CD of new music. It doesn’t make up for the time spent apart, per se. But, its a nice little bonus of sorts.

This last weekend, when everything went haywire due to a last-minute show being added, we again landed on things coming out better. Plus, we got to once again do something we’d otherwise have never done.

I drove up to Indianapolis, IN, for their show. Now, being from Texas, its still very strange to me to be able to drive to another state — much less through a whole state into yet another one! — for a concert. The 5 hour drive wasn’t bad at all. It was actually a very pleasant and beautiful drive.

The show was great, and we had friends there who we got to have fun with after the show. Due to checking in to our hotel so late, we ended up actually having our room through Monday! We discussed it and decided to stay an extra day.


I would have never known that Indianapolis was such a fascinating and beautiful city! We got to explore downtown, and I just could not get over how much there was to see. I sent my parents a cell phone photo of the skyline, and they too were amazed we were where we were… doing what we were doing. Heck, we discovered we enjoyed the city so much, we want to go back when it is warm so we can explore on foot! (It was SO cold and we had not packed for it, thinking we were going straight back home on Sunday.)

I plan to travel South soon to another show, and I will get the chance to explore some Southern history… whereas in Indiana there were such old buildings from a more Northern perspective. (Duh, right?) I have my fingers crossed my husband will soon get to fulfill one of his life-long dreams of played an awards show, and that I’ll get to come along to see that. I spoke with one of the crew’s wife and she plans to go with them on an upcoming California trip.

California would be so wonderful to get to come out to see them. I have friends there that I am itching to see again. However, funds will keep me grounded for this run. But, perhaps some day! You never know. All things are possible…

Coming from a girl who grew up in a small town, that has been quite the lesson learned. Often small town minds don’t see beyond their city limits. But there is a whole world out there to explore. And so many things that seem impossible, ARE possible. And I am forever grateful to the things I have gotten to experience…

Like I said… its difficult to be “a musician’s widow,” and its not a “job” many are cut out to handle. But, if you’re willing to put the faith, trust and belief in your marriage out there… it does come with its perks: both tangible and intangible.

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When Things Go Crazy

Stress can be negative or it can be positive. I think it all depends on how you react to said stress.

Yesterday, my husband and I went from having a couple of quiet days ahead of us to having to get him ready and to the bus in about four hours time. A last-minute show (filling in for a fellow, ailing, artist) came into the schedule and they had to be in Wisconsin by the next morning. We got the call at about 5 pm.

At first, I was a little bit frustrated by the change in schedule. But, it didn’t take long to realize I needed to just be grateful for the added show. Plus, last-minute changes in his work schedule are not new to us. Though, usually its a show canceled last moment versus one being added! Nice change of pace right there!!

We had been out running errands, and I had planned a nice supper at home. However, with the newly truncated time schedule, we opted for a quick meal out. As soon as we got home, my husband got to work learning a new song they want to put in the show. I, on the other hand, quickly got to work on getting things together for him to go. I made coffee for him to have for driving the bus for a few hours. I ironed his show shirts. I was happy to do all I could to make this change in plans easier to handle.

What’s funny, though, is that I think we were both in a total daze for most of the evening. It can be hard to comprehend the changes that have occurred, even as you are handling them.

When the time came, I took him to bus call. I plan to drive to his show on Saturday, and we’ll drive back from there together. So there was no need for him to take his truck to the bus lot and then try to figure out a way to pick it up later this weekend.

My point in all of it is this: when changes occur, you can either fight them or adjust with them. Adjusting with them admittedly challenging, but its also less stressful. Why? Because if we all make adjustments together, less changes have to occur for each person. And that’s just a much happier and more peaceful situation — no matter what the specific case may be.

Ultimately, for us, this probably ended up being a good change. It’ll make for a less stressful weekend for both of us in the end. A few hours of, “ACK!” is worth it.