Musician's Widow

I don’t get into many “reality TV” shows. Oh okay, so I am hooked on Top Chef shows. And I’m kinda all about Food Network. But you know what I mean. I watch and enjoy shows like Amazing Race and Undercover Boss. But if I miss it, not a big deal. I might catch up on what I missed on On Demand. I might not.

However, this season of Celebrity Apprentice SUCKED ME IN when, in a fit of “there’s nothing else to watch,” I listened to a repeat of it on MSNBC (I think it was). Just listening as I worked on other things, I found myself more and more curious about it. And I had to catch each week’s episode on On Demand, and I actually made sure I sat my butt down for the finale to see who won.

First and foremost, I am not a John Rich fan… its been my experience that you’ll actually have a bit of a hard time finding many in the Nashville area that are. That being said, within one episode, I was totally on Team John Rich. I was so thoroughly impressed with how he approached every task that by tonight, I was on the edge of my seat rooting for him.

I’ve supported St. Jude for years. Participated in fundraisers for then since I was in elementary school. And while the Muscular Dystrophy Association has my heart these days (see here, here and here), St. Jude also holds a huge place in it as well. Few things can dissolve me into tears like videos about St. Judes, and my heart aches every time I drive by that hospital on I-40 in Memphis.

That all being said, St. Jude is not why I rooted for John Rich. No one charity is more deserving than the other. Every charity is doing WONDERFUL things to make life better for others… and every single one deserved that money.  So when the winner was announced, it wasn’t saying, “Your charity is better.” it was saying, “This celebrity executed the job the best.”

Things I picked up from Celebrity Apprentice:

• “Yes, sir!” has not gone out of style. It is still just as valid and appreciated today as it was 50 years ago. It’s a sign of respect, and it should always be used. Always.
• Especially when its joined with a strong, firm handshake. The handshake, too, has not gone out of style.
• Take into account what someone has to say. It doesn’t mean you have to do their suggestion, but they just might have a kernel of an idea that you can grow into something bigger. What everyone has to say is valid, even if you end up having to dismiss it.
• Be firm in your orders, and don’t waver. Sometimes you have to be tough with someone, but do so respectfully and you’ll not only get your point across but you’ll avoid making an enemy.
• Delegate. Delegate. Delegate. The biggest thing I saw in the first part of the finale was when John Rich took Star Jones on his team, and the first thing he had her do was create them a timeline.  Brilliant move, I thought. Acting on her organizational strengths, and delegating it to her to make them a schedule that then HE had to ensure they kept. As I said, brilliant. Delegating at its finest. I need to learn this.
• It’s good to be passionate about your cause, but its not good to be overly emotional about it, either.
• When the unexpected happens, think on your feet and “make it up” as you go.

That’s just a few things I picked up while watching this season’s Celebrity Apprentice. I think this was one case when I believe the better of the two won. As one of the celebrities said, Marlee had an amazing fundraising project (setting a new record high on the show!) but John had an amazing season. I have huge respect for him as a businessman, and, hey, he got Donald Trump to put on a cowboy hat on network TV. You can’t deny his power of leadership to pull that off!!

We survived another tax season. Every year, my parents and I say at least once twice a few dozen times, “This year is going to be the death of me!” That’s the stress talking. We aren’t being literal.

We hope.

Every year, we find new ways to make the process smoother, just as the government finds ways to complicate things. You can claim that this year, but not next year. You can itemize this but not that. You get this credit but only if you stand on your head and drink water while saying the alphabet backwards.

You think I’m kidding? I swear that one is in the tax code somewhere. If it isn’t, it should be. If for no other reason that to give tax preparers something to laugh about as they wade through the idiosyncrasies of the tax code.

What makes the job so stressful is the fact that you’re dealing with people’s financial outlook. Mistakes can cost your client thousands of dollars and can even land a huge fine (or worse!) on the tax preparer. We strive to do the job RIGHT. No law bending or “personal interpretation” being done here!

So, within that, I present to you my tax season pet peeves for 2011 (in no particular order):

• Please don’t wait until the last minute to bring in your tax work and discover you have items missing… then STILL expect the return done by deadline. Let me introduce you to Mr. Extension. He will be taking care of you this trip, and we’ll attack your lack of information sometime AFTER deadline.
• We aren’t mind readers. We don’t sit with a crystal ball to consult on every return. Did you have a child this year? Did you get married? Divorced? Move? Go self-employed? Buy stocks? Did your nephew come to live with you for the year? These are all things we NEED to know to properly do your return. Just because your baby’s birth announcement ran in the newspaper back in July of last year doesn’t mean we saw it. Help us out here. (And when we DO ask, don’t get snippy with us. Just give us the information… please?)
• The old idea of throwing your receipts in a shoe box for your preparer to wade through is just not happening these days. Either wade through them yourself and put them in some sort of order or be prepared to be charged extra for the extra work/stress you’ve brought to our office. Or, you know, meet Mr. Extension.
• Bigger and better refunds than the competition! Bull corn. If you’re going to get a refund its based on tax codes and how everything falls together on your return. If you owe, it doesn’t mean WE (the preparer) screwed up. It just means you owe money. When a software or tax company promises you bigger refunds than the competition, it doesn’t mean they have this magic dust they sprinkle on the paper to make it appear. It just means its a gimmick to get you in the door.
• Please don’t try to get us to lower our fees. I had a whole blog post on this earlier this year. See it for more on THAT whole rant of mine.
• If we take a message instead of patch you through to the preparer you wish to speak with, its not because we don’t love you anymore. Its because they are doing a return and need to focus to do the job right. You get mad if we make a mistake (and we’re human, so it happens), but you have to understand that often mistakes occur due to constant interruption while the work is being done. We might not take you call because we DO love you. See?
• If you feel like I might be treating you like a 5th grader, its because I’ve found its just a good rule of thumb. It never fails that when I assume someone already knows where to sign, etc… they don’t. So its just easier to assume you DON’T know and risk offending you than it is to assume you DO know and then get us ALL in a heap of trouble.
• We have over 400 clients. Yes, over half of you have been coming to us for 5 – 10 years (or longer). Still… help me out with your name when you come in to pick up your return or if you want to see someone. It’s not that I don’t love you, its that sometimes I just haven’t had enough coffee to put a name to a face. Some days, there just isn’t enough coffee in the world. Feel free, in that moment, to treat ME like a fifth grader. I won’t mind. I promise.
• If I give you that deer in the headlight look its because you just asked me something I can’t answer. I figure you know that, but, hey, sometimes people reword the question thinking maybe I’ll know the answer if they do that. Nope. I still don’t know the answer, and now you’ve made me feel dumb twice. Give me a moment to find someone who CAN answer the question. Thanks.
• Please don’t ask us to bend the rules. We won’t. And when we refuse, don’t get angry. We’re telling you no for your own good. Kinda like the time your Mom said you couldn’t have that candy bar before supper, because she knew if you ate it you wouldn’t want that yummy pizza she was making. Remember? Yeah, kinda like that. Only we are saying you can’t fudge the rules because we don’t want anyone to go to jail, nor anyone pay a huge fine and yucky stuff like that. We’re licensed professionals. We do things by the book.
• Finally, please don’t ask me to discuss politics. Not only do I just not want to go there, but with the work we’re doing, it just isn’t appropriate. I’m so glad you’re so passionate about it, but please don’t ask me to jump on your bandwagon for the sake of making you happy. Lets do the work at hand and move on from there.

Oh I’m sure I have plenty more little things that either made me cover my face or beat my head on the desk over the last few months, but I figure these suffice.

Ah. We did it. Another season in the books. A lot of extensions to do in the coming weeks/months, but we’re always grateful for that as well. Thankful for another successful season, and thankful for the loyalty of our clients. Without them, we’d be nowhere. So even as I have my little pet peeves, at the end of the day… I don’t really mind. It keeps things interesting at least.

The government and media can tell us all they want that the economy is getting better, but I know from where I stand… it sure doesn’t feel like it. I’m doing ok right now just because we’ve found ways to cut costs left and right.

But… at what point does cutting costs reach the point of insult?

Where I am working right now, at least once a week it seems someone comes in ready to negotiate their bill down to a lower price. Every time that happens, I’m left with a sick taste in my mouth. (It happened twice in one day recently, and it sent me in to a fit of pure anger… something that VERY rarely happens.) Why? Because I know what goes into doing the service being provided: aka Overhead.

When you receive a bill for a service, what you have to realize is that the bill exists to help cover hundreds of hidden costs.

Let’s take your local plumber. You call him to come unclog a drain, and when you receive the bill you might find yourself asking yourself, “Why so high when he was only here for 10 minutes.”

What you don’t see is:

• fuel costs to drive over
• the expense of having the proper tools to do the job
• training and KNOWLEDGE of how to fix the problem quickly and efficient.
• taxes paid by the business owner to even be in business.
• insurance they have to carry.
• etc.

In my own case, when doing any design work, I often try to figure myself by hours of work… plus a little extra to help me afford the computer I need to do the work. The programs. The hours I’ve spent learning how to do the work.

I’m not just putting food on the table. I’m trying to stay in business. And at the end of the day, the only number that can truly be negotiated down is what you think that individuals time and knowledge are worth. And it is in that moment that negotiating a bill down comes off as insulting. Just as you’re trying to save money, a business it trying to stay in business… and those words, “Why so high!?” can easily be the equivalent of, “You’re just not worth that!”

If everyone were to negotiate their bills down as hard as some people do, businesses would go out of business left and right. Now, I’m not saying you can’t ever negotiate to get a better deal. I’m just saying… sometimes take a step back and realize its not only about you.

A couple summers ago, my husband and I started work towards opening a nightclub. It sits across from the bar we both call our home away from home, the one I am working in tonight. It’s a gorgeous building, and I still sit staring at it wistfully. We worked hard on our business plan. We met with contractors. We studied demographics. We researched grants.

In the end, we abandoned the project due to the economy. Finding a private investor proved harder than we anticipated, and the pricetag was scary.

It is a project left undone.

We still hold the dream of some day running a bar or nightclub. But this particular one was not meant to be.

Similarly, about six years ago, I looked into running my own music magazine. I forget now how the option came to land in my lap, but it was exciting! It was my first taste of a business plan, budgeting, and the true behind-the-scenes of publishing.

Legal and financial reasons brought it to a screeching halt.  Again, it wasn’t meant to be… but I’ve never (obviously) lost the publishing bug.

Projects left undone… we all have them. Sometimes its strictly never meant to be, others are just not meant to be right then. Either way, lessons are learned, and you walk away wiser. Just because its undone, it not anything to consider lost.

What are some of your projects left undone? Are they done for good, or just on pause?

Since last weekend, I’ve had dogs and cats on the brain. Chewing on the different approaches of the two animals, I realized you could easily take those dynamics and apply them to employee interactions in an office setting.

Are you a dog or are you a cat?  I don’t mean which one do you prefer; I mean which one’s personalities do you emulate while at work.

The dog

When we took in the dog for the weekend, the thing that struck me was how he was so “in your face” at all times.  I couldn’t move two feet and he’d be on my heels. (Something that drove me CRAZY!) In a matter of moments, he’d uprooted my cat and taken his spot on the couch beside me. He was domineering.

It struck me quickly how people can be that way in life and in business. There are those personality types that will be right in your face, demanding attention and approval from their peers and superiors.

Imagine for yourself a new guy walks in the door at work. His eyes are bright with excitement for the job, and any time the boss comes in the door he’s on their heels asking what he can do. What’s the next big project? Do you need coffee? A pen? Something to write on? What can I do for you?

There is without a doubt something to be said for someone with that personality. They’re going to be the first in line to do anything. They’re going to jump when they think something needs to be done immediately.

We all need “dogs” in our lives to keep us motivated as well as to be reliable. You know they’re going to be right there the second you open your mouth to ask for something. Sometimes they’re there even when you don’t need anything… and that’s okay too.

Dogs will more than likely move up the “food chain” quickly due to their persistence and unending amount of motivation and energy. However, I’m not sure what their chances are of being in upper management. Some “dogs” have that leadership quality inherently. Many, though, aim to please and are best being told what to do.

The cat

Comparing cats and dogs is about like telling the tortoise and the hare story.

Cats are more laid back and less in your face. They’re around, doing their thing, all while observing the scene around them. Taking stock of it. Deciding the best maneuver for themselves based on those observations.

When the dog was getting a little overly attentive to me, I’d find myself wanting to seek out my cat. I wanted his calm approach more than the hyper approach of the dog that was driving me a little crazy. I wanted to throw the dog a stick to go one way while I went to hang with the cat.

I imagine in an office setting, a “cat” is that person who sticks to their desk and methodically does the job at hand. They may not necessarily seek out the next job they need to do, and as such could potentially be viewed as being lazy. They might even be that person who gets their neighbor to get them a cup of coffee, “whenever you happen to go that way.”

However, at the end of the day, they get the job done without having made much noise. They’d be the ones who might not get noticed as fast, but they’d also be the ones that get sought out specifically for a task.

I imagine they’d also make great bosses. They’d give you the job, let you know what is expected of you, and instead of beating you over the head with it, they just give you that stare. The one that is disapproving. The one the might make you think they plan to kill you in your sleep. The one you don’t want to get, and thus you do the job without having to be told more than once. It’s not that you know what your punishment is… it’s more that you don’t ever want to find out what it would be!

Other pets

I don’t think I have to explain the snake personality. It is that person who lies in wait — possibly even emulating the cat personality– only, they will be the first to strike and take you out if you get in their way.

Hamsters run and run and run, only to never really get anywhere. They’re just happy to be there.

Horses pull the load and do the hard work. They end up, though, having someone always telling them what to do and when to do it. They’re revered and respected, but at the end of the day they’re never going to make any final decisions of their own.

Personification of animals is nothing new. This whole thing was just something fun I’ve chewed on the last few days.

I took a lot of sociology courses through college — which, by the way, I hated but always just fit in my schedule somehow. Sadly in hindsight, I was very close to having at least a minor in it. I took a few philosophy courses and one psychology course. So, this is my disclaimer: I write this with no real education or paper on the wall to back up anything here. These are just my personal opinions and thoughts.

By the way, I’m not only a cat person, but I’m a “cat” in business as well. Anyone have any idea what they are, and why?